Claire Bear

Brushy was a very spooky feral cat who, years ago, would sneak up on the back porch late at night to eat cat food we'd set out for Eli.  I spent weeks trying to tame him down.  He was so hungry that he'd let me stand next to him while he ate, growling, but would never let me touch him.  

One night, instead of trying to touch his hip, I reached up and touched his head.  He immediately bumped his head up into my hand, as cats do, and from that second on was completely tame.  I took him to the vet for a check and 'tutering and when I brought him home the next day I didn't hesitate to turn him loose.  I knew he'd not run off.  

But he did...sort of.  He disappeared and then reappeared a couple days later with a small black kitten in tow.  Claire Bear was always Brushy's cat and she may have actually been one of his kittens as they had a similar body shape.  Where he was very friendly though, she preferred to be left alone and spent most of her life tucked away in the barn and most never saw her.

Oh, she'd come out and talk to us some, but if we tried to pet her or pick her up, she darted or squirmed away.  God forbid if you had to take her to the vet.  Yearly vaccinations became a farm call rather than an office visit.  She was an odd cat, but we didn't care.  She was Brushy's cat and that was enough.

And yet...as socially awkward as she was, if we left town for a couple days, she was always the very first cat to meet us at the gate when we got home.  We always had a farm sitter, so we knew it wasn't because the food bowl was empty.  She actually seemed excited and happy we were home and we knew, in her own way, Claire Bear loved us.

A couple weeks ago she started asking to come into the house.  She'd walk around the kitchen, eat some of Betsy's food and then curl up on one of the dog beds and go to sleep.  She'd lost a little weight and looked like her teeth might be causing her some trouble so I got up my nerve and took her to the vet.  

Yes, her teeth were bad, but her bigger issue was her kidneys.  She stayed in the ICU at the clinic for several days and we hoped when they sent her home that she was rehydrated and stabilized enough that she might have some good months left, but it was not to be.

Interestingly, for those last few days, Claire Bear loved to be petted, followed us around the house, slept on the bed one night, was really happy if I'd sit on the floor with her and once even crawled into my lap.  

Was she making up for lost time, both giving and receiving?  Was she just looking for some comfort because she didn't feel well?  I'm not sure.  What I do believe, as she sat watching at that gate one last time, that Claire Bear knew she was loved and knew we knew she loved us as well and I think that was important to her.

Claire Bear 

2005 - March 14, 2019